If only we could truly trust!
I recall several major instances now, in which it was naturally expected that I would be worked up and distraught; instances that definitely justified such. But much to my dismay and confusion, I found myself totally careless. It had no intense or lasting effect, it really had no bearing on me whatsoever. I could have cared-less. The reason being: I knew that Christ had allowed it – organized events as such – and no matter *how* bad the situation, He had a plan and a purpose. He had everything in control and there was nothing I could do to “right” things anyway. I’ve known horrible situations in which I’ve been completely care-free, and at times I have to wonder if I’m in the wrong for not carrying some of the load, but if my Lord’s carrying it for me, I mean…explain to me why I should! Now I must admit, as humbling as it be, that I’m sure some of the reason why I didn’t react, was because others reacted. Not acting rightly like I should, I tend to react opposite to how others react. Try driving with me sometime: (better yet, just ask Dad 😀 ) if a car was headed through an intersection milliseconds away from broadsiding me and you were in your calm manner warning me (more like natural reaction: screaming in my ear!), I’d probably take my timely manner of evaluating as to which plan I should follow – plan A or plan B. But, before I decided on a plan I’d probably ask you to talk a little quieter and calm down. That is, if I attained the skill of thinking and speaking at the same time! Ok, regardless of all that though, you’ve only heard one side of the story. I have the uncunning habit of giving the best part first and saving the worst for last.
So yeah. Bad news is:
It’s usually the little things – seriously – just petty, stupid, little things, that get me aggravated to great extremes. Like a vacuum that wont work right, or a pan that you stuck in the bottom of the oven that you can’t get out, and you’ve burnt your hands half a dozen times on it because of these retarded, crotched, pot-holders that happen to be the only ones that exist around the place because they were made by kin folk. Maybe a little bigger and more serious than that, but still. If only I could always bear in mind that Divine Providence made it happen for a reason!
That would have to be heaven on earth! Not a single care on your shoulder because you gave them all to Christ. Completely careless – knowing that He holds everything in His hands and nothing, absolutely nothing, can happen without His consent. Ah! Such bliss!